How to Care Less About What People Think: A Tru Lady’s Guide To Living Fearlessly

In our new blog series, we interview people about their personal mental health struggles, self-discovery, and healing. We hope that in their collective wisdom, you will discover something that resonates with you. People like A Tru Lady serve as brave reminders that we are more alike than different and that every one of us has a story of empowerment to share.

Meet A Tru Lady

Like many artists, A Tru Lady has been creative her entire life. Art is her primary form of self-expression, whether that be poetry, film, script writing, radio, blogging, or podcasting. Passionate about the arts as a means of self-discovery, A Tru Lady is working on opening her own podcast/content studio, so that other creatives will have a space to create! Here, she discusses her own journey of healing.

The Interview

Q: What are your goals in life?

Looking for a sweet way to reduce stress & anxiety?

Living fearlessly

Some psychologists believe that humans only have two basic emotions– love and fear– and that all other emotions derive from these two. Think about what drives you in your life. Most likely, love and fear are big contributors. Over the course of human evolution, we have been wired to pursue what we love and avoid what we fear. But as A Tru Lady discovered, that avoidance comes at a cost. Fear of rejection and/or failure can interfere with our ability to be our truest selves.

Fear of rejection and/or failure can interfere with our ability to be our truest selves.

Projection

Another social psychological phenomenon that leads us away from our true selves is projection. Projection is when someone displaces their own feelings or experiences onto someone else. Often, this is done subconsciously. For example, a parent who was once bullied for being different might unwittingly shame a child for being different as a way of protecting them from the same mistreatment. As the saying goes, “The way someone treats you says nothing about you and everything about them.”

How to care less about what people think

Of course, ignoring what other people say and think is not easy. We are social beings, wired to care about one another and our social standing. Anyone who says, “I don’t care what people think” is likely trying to preempt criticism and not stating the honest truth. And yet, when people in hospice are asked to list their biggest life regrets, they often say, “I wish I had cared less about what people think.”

  • Practice self-compassion
  • Focus on your values
  • Challenge negative thoughts
  • Surround yourself with positive people
  • Practice self-care
  • Engage in activities that you enjoy
What brings you the most joy?

Conclusion

It’s important to remember that living fearlessly and learning how to care less about what people think is a process. It requires shifting your focus away from external validation and towards what matters to you personally. Though it may take some time to get to a place where you feel more confident and free to be who you are, with practice and persistence, you can learn to trust yourself and be less affected by the opinions of others!

Why do I care so much about what others think?

Many people care what others think because they want to fit in and feel accepted. People also want to feel validated and appreciated by their surroundings. It is natural to have some concern about how others perceive you, but it can become a problem if it prevents you from expressing your true self or taking risks. If you find that you are constantly worrying about what others think, it may be helpful to take a step back and focus on what is important to you.

Why am I so bothered about what others think?

It is natural to be concerned about what others think of you. It is part of human nature to be concerned about how others perceive us, and to want to make a good impression. However, it is important to remember that other people’s opinions are not the ultimate measure of your worth. Try to focus on your own values and strengths, and remember that you are the only one who can decide how to live your life.

How do you not let people’s opinions bother you?

  1. Focus on yourself and your goals. Everyone has opinions, and they don’t all have to match yours. Don’t let them define you or your actions.
  2. Remember that criticism can be constructive. If someone has a valid point, take it into consideration.
  3. Remind yourself that you are the only one who knows what’s best for you. Be confident in your decisions and don’t let others sway you.
  4. Don’t take things personally. People’s opinions are not a reflection of you as a person, so don’t let them get you down.
  5. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. If someone’s opinion is offensive or hurtful, don’t hesitate to let them know.

--

--

Directly translated wohlgefühl means pleasant feeling sense of well-being. Read about everything mental health and wellness.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Filler bite - Wohlgefühl

Directly translated wohlgefühl means pleasant feeling sense of well-being. Read about everything mental health and wellness.